Now tell me EXACTLY what do YOU bring to the table?

Single and looking.... give me a second and try to feel me on this. I need you to step back for a minute, strip yourself naked, stand in the middle of your mind's truths truth, and answer that question for me.

That second-word truth was not a typo, though I am suitable for those whenever I'mmind's in the zone. But not this time. I meant exactly what I said. I say that because we often repeat something so much to others that we start to believe what we are saying over time. Still, unless you are losing it, for the most part, even between the lies and trying to turn those lies into the truth…. lays the absolute truth and nothing but the truth. It can be challenging for some people to sit alone and say, I've been repeating this mess for so long that I almost believe myself, but deep down….I know I'm being full of it. So when it's

all said and done, as you find yourself among the category of being single and looking, can you genuinely say that you are exactly as you claim to be and if so, is that person the prototype of what you wish for in your mate? No, of course, you don't want the replica of yourself. That would be way too boring or, in some instances, a bit too much for one relationship to handle. Can you imagine Kanye West married to a female version of him? Well then, too, he did somehow, and look at them now. Still, it's only natural to wish to connect with someone that you can meet in the middle on various levels. However, I often hear people run down a laundry list (where did that terminology come from and who makes a list of their laundry) of the things they desire in a mate. And yet, as I am sitting there listening to this person, I begin to assess the things that I know about them – then I compare it to what they are saying that they are seeking, and in my mind, I'm going….ARE YOU PHUCKING KIDDING ME!!!! Okay, by all means, I am a softie in some areas, but when it comes to certain things, I am solid as a rock, and my opinion is one of them. So, to start this off, I will speak about my sisters. You'll soon learn that I am pretty good at being even in my way of thinking as I give it to my sisters just as much as my brothers, and by no means am I self-righteous. I tend to write about what I know, which means that I will often lay my own dirt out for the world to see. So in speaking about my beautiful black queens, I have to admit that it takes everything within me to hold my tongue when I hear a sister – especially an EX-friend of mine (another blog for another day), say that she is tired of the meeting broke ass men. Yet, in her 46 years, she's never made more than 15.00 an hour. She has five repos on her credit and six broken leases, not to mention the last time she saw the inside of a school was when she cleaned out her locker after deciding she'd instead drop out and get her GED. Nothing burns me up more than to hear a sister with nothing and not trying to do anything to better herself, always talking about bagging a baller or, at the very least, someone that has something. However, they have not a cot dayum thing in their purse but Wet and Wild makeup, a prepaid debit card with a hot twenty dollars until payday, and lint. Explain this one to me, sisters. How can you drive a Hyundai Scoupe, but you will have the audacity to cut your eyes at a brother in a Nissan Maxima? And 2015 one at that saying, "Girl, please, the least he can do is put some rims on it?" Huh? But you're missing two of your hubcaps and riding around with plastic on the passenger side glass!!! How can you live in a 179.99 a week extended stay with a coffee maker and a hot plate; or just as bad, be living back at home with your mama sleeping in a twin bed but won't give the brother a second date once you find that he only has a ranch style home with a nicely manicured lawn and one car garage. I might add that you're losing weight and not on purpose, but because you're eating tuna fish for lunch and Oodles of Noodles for dinner, you give off the facade of being insulted when he wants to grab a bite to eat at Applebee'syou're and not Canoe. Canoe??!!! Girl, you don't even know where Canoe is; you just heard Frank Ski mention it on the radio a zillion times back in the day. So explain to me exactly how you want Canoe even though the tags you just tore off your outfit said Rainbow from inside Greenbriar Mall, and the shoes were purchased at Shoe Land at Stonecrest for the hot 10.99. Girl, please go sit down. I could go on and on about my sisters, but then this would be a five-page read, and I know how we love to say, 'I hate to read,' so that's another blog for another day yet again. (I shake my head at that one every day).

So here goes for the brothers looking for a dime piece with barely two shiny pennies in his pockets to rub together.

*****I try not to refer to people as ugly because God made us all beautiful in his eyes, and everyone is attractive to someone, so though it would be easy to talk about the facially challenged wanting Salli Richardson for a woman....you won't see that here***** So let me put this another way….why do brothers nowadays feel that just because they are dominant in our race. A hot commodity like gas briefly was in Atlanta a few months ago…… they can say chuck (remove the first two letters and replace with an F) it, and step to a sister half-ass expecting us to feel honored? With only a few exceptions granted, Grown men should not be happily living at home with mama yet believing that sisters still should see them as dateable. If you are not taking care of her financially, she is not ill, or you are not genuinely going through hard times – recession means that you "possibly" could get a pass - then you should not be in the gym talking that madness with your boys about how you want a dime piece. You can't afford a Church's Chicken two-piece; now, do you think you're going to be kicking it at my house all the time and eventually lying up in my bed because your mother said… "You ain't gonna have them h ****'s laying up in here"! This leads to a dual situation….my opinion, with very few exceptions….no man should be moving into a woman's" home. I see this way too much. He moves out of his mother's or girlfriend's house and right into yours. He's trifling, and you're crazy. The ONLY exception should be if you own a home, he's leasing, and you're getting married in a few months. Or, you're getting married, you all decide your house is bigger and his house sells before the wedding takes place. Then we have the brothers that have no issues at all with asking a woman for money, clothes, to pay his car note, buy him rims, let him hold her credit/ATM card, pay for the date when they go out, etc. Yes, a brother can be a gold digger too, leaving a sister asking what is so commonly asked by men these days – OKAY, SO TELL ME EXACTLY WHAT DO YOU BRING TO THE TABLE? We don't hear the sisters singing about their independence more than we do the men now. Not only are they basking in and enjoying the fact that we now have our own money, house, and cars, but they are at times seeking out these types of women mainly because they know that for so many, they still find the other side of their bed cold and will do virtually anything to say that they now have a man including turning into his ATM. There is nothing wrong with having a brother that makes less than you, but there is something wrong with that brother laying down and allowing you to take care of him. A man should want to step up his game, not throw his hands up. I find myself to be long-winded, so I'll stop right there. But who knows…. I'll probably hear some madness somewhere and do a part two. Until then….

Chloe